There’s a tightrope, not sturdy at all
Just one slip and one may fall
Balancing poles don’t help that much
The rope is so fine; they are hard to clutch
Carefully she walks; every step so cautious
One step out of place will make me feel nauseous
Because, you see, the tightrope is the finest line there is
I don’t think there are many who can play it like a whiz
But there are those select few
Who know what to do
Perhaps a special being
Who is talented at seeing
Who can speak without pity, yet fail to ignore,
Not ask stupid questions or seem like a bore,
Validate my feelings, not disregard reality,
One who makes decisions using pure morality.
To hurt, she never does intend
She never fails to comprehend
The relationship indeed is far from pretend
And she’d never, ever, EVER offend
That is,
Because,
She is my friend.
Just one slip and one may fall
Balancing poles don’t help that much
The rope is so fine; they are hard to clutch
Carefully she walks; every step so cautious
One step out of place will make me feel nauseous
Because, you see, the tightrope is the finest line there is
I don’t think there are many who can play it like a whiz
But there are those select few
Who know what to do
Perhaps a special being
Who is talented at seeing
Who can speak without pity, yet fail to ignore,
Not ask stupid questions or seem like a bore,
Validate my feelings, not disregard reality,
One who makes decisions using pure morality.
To hurt, she never does intend
She never fails to comprehend
The relationship indeed is far from pretend
And she’d never, ever, EVER offend
That is,
Because,
She is my friend.
10 comments:
I envy you for the trust you have with this friend. Good friends are far and few. So happy that you have this support. May the tightrope walk soon end and you find yourself comfortably back on solid ground albeit a different one from the solid ground at the other end of the rope, but stable nontheless.
Is this the best friend you mentioned in a comment on halfshared's blog? I was so inspired by that comment. BH for the good ones...
I just discovered your blog.
You seemed to have suffered a lot of hurt, but from what I've read, you seem strong and determined to go on. People like you give me the the will and strength to go through my own trials and tribulations in life (non-marraige-B"H I am happily married to a wonderful man).
I wish you much hatzlacha, strength and happiness.
Such friends are precious and few...and we treasure them all the more so for their scarcity.
I hope that soon you'll find your balance.
A friend like that is hard to find. I would love to be like that too..any ideas on how to be just the right blend..of caring yet not nosy etc?
behind a smile - thanks... actually, I wasn't even thinking of a particular friend. it was more so the idea of what a true friend SHOULD be.. and unfortunately, how many have not been true to me during this difficult time in my life. Amen to your bracha - thank you.
still in shidduchim - Oops! My memory fails me..I don't recall...which comment
was that/what did I say?
little birdies - welcome! Thank you for the compliment and I am so glad to be able to give someone else strength, especially when I feel like I'm feeding off of others in a major way these days.
Scraps - AMEN!
halfshared - IMHO, "what is love?" is the 10,000 dollar question... the one you have asked, comes in a close second. It's a very fine line. Friends that don't leave me alone (but not in an annoying way) are ones I hold dear to my heart. Those are the ones who don't need the call back. They are the ones who say "I just want to make sure you're okay and when you're ready to call back, you call me." Yet, they also call back again the next day if/when they don't hear from me. These are the friends that write cards to let you know they are constantly thinking about you and will try to take you out, get you to laugh, validate all of your feelings. They never give you the "head tilt" or any pitied looks. They never treat you differently for the situation you are in. Last but DEFINITELY not least, these friends never ever fall off the face of the earth. I call that betrayal.
Gosh, I'm not sure these people exist...
This is the comment you posted (halfshared's post was called "It hurts when" from July 25, 2007):
Firstly, your poem was beautiful, halfshared.
Secondly, I'd like to comment on a different light. I am a married woman and I never understood why the pattern of married friends falling off the face of the earth exists. Yes it did happen to me before I got married, and I vowed to myself that I'd never do it, and I didn't. Every single one of my close friends still play an important part of my life. I am in my twenties, and while the majority of my friends are married, my best friend from HS is still single. And guess what - she remains my best friend to this day. In fact, I am going through very troubled times right now and guess who's been there for me the most -- her. So go figure.
I don't get the idea of throwing the friends who are dear to you out in the dust just because you are married and they are not. I never have, and I never will. I have watched it happen so many times and I still fail to understand. In fact, I think it's quite an immature way of thinking, IMHO.
Any thoughts on that?
****
For me, it was inspiring to hear that such friends exist. And BH, I can answer your question if such people exist from personal experience, that yes, they do! Very very few of them, chances are there will only be one in your life (if that many), but BH, they do exist. And they make life a much sunnier place.
still in shidduchim - wow, now I remember that post. It was from a while back... when I was still... er, married. I'm so honored and glad to hear that it was inspirational to read. Please please trust me that such friends exist. I would never hurt my friend that way. And I know all of you bloggers wouldn't either.
You know what, people don't know what life is going to be like until they're in that situation. Just like all of us would say "of course we would never do that to a friend!"...scores of very fine human beings DO do that time and time again. I hope that all this talk on so many blogs on this topic only encourage us to be better friends (instead of depressing us ;-) ). I do trust you that such friends exist. Since I first read that comment of yours till now, I've gotten greater clarity on the issue and know that it's true.
Well, I guess I can speak from experience cuz I've been there. I was married for five years and I never dropped my friends. In fact, I was almost insulted when they didn't want to call ME (perhaps they felt weird?).... I know that G-dwilling, when I marry again, I will act the same way. Dropping your friends is not cool. I have said this before and I'll say it again: I view it as immature. But, still in shidduchim, you are right... we don't know what we will be like until we are there. I only say what I'm saying because I was once there.
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