The Tightrope

There’s a tightrope, not sturdy at all
Just one slip and one may fall
Balancing poles don’t help that much
The rope is so fine; they are hard to clutch

Carefully she walks; every step so cautious
One step out of place will make me feel nauseous
Because, you see, the tightrope is the finest line there is
I don’t think there are many who can play it like a whiz

But there are those select few
Who know what to do
Perhaps a special being
Who is talented at seeing

Who can speak without pity, yet fail to ignore,
Not ask stupid questions or seem like a bore,
Validate my feelings, not disregard reality,
One who makes decisions using pure morality.

To hurt, she never does intend
She never fails to comprehend
The relationship indeed is far from pretend
And she’d never, ever, EVER offend

That is,
Because,
She is my friend.

Would You Make A Shidduch With Someone From The Torah?

Well, let's see.....

There's....

Avrohom Avinu: He seems to be frum but really he's a BT and his father made idols, not our kind...next.

Yitzchak Avinu: Well his grandfather made idols, there was all that nastiness with Lot and is half brother is an Arab.

Yaakov Avinu: His great-grandfather made idols, his brother went off the derech, his mother comes from a very traif family and he wasn't shomer negiah with Rachel Imeinu before they were married. Oh, and he spent a lot of time with his uncle, who's a rasha.

Yosef HaTzaddik: His mother had an idol once and she died early, plus he's a slave and his brothers don't like him, must be something in that and with all the issues with Avraham Avinu and Yitzchak and Yaakov Avinu...better not to.

Moshe Rabbeinu: His parents separated, then they got back together, his parents abandoned him, put him in a basket, he was raised by goyim...not our kind for sure. He may be close to Hashem but his background is so problematic, we wouldn't want him in OUR family!

Calev's descendants: We don't want to marry into that family. Enough said.

Dovid HaMelech: Descendants from a Geyoret, not our kind of people. Sure a few generations have gone by but all things being equal shouldn't we look for someone with more 'Jewish' background?

Shlomo HaMelech: See above, all his mother's marriage was very dubious, he is rich though but the yichus and family background is very tricky.

So what does this seem like to you all? IMHO? Seems like we all need a kick in the butt, people.

Struggle Of The Day

Ever feel like you made a mistake but don't feel bad for it? Ever feel like you lost your morals because you can't control yourself anymore? What if you can't remember what is right and what is wrong just because you feel like your life is to hard to take?

I'm not asking for much; just happiness. When will the pain stop? When will the tears cease to flow? I don't even care about him; just what he is doing to me. How much torture..how much more will I have to endure? When will I be left alone? When will G-d say, "now you can move on, it's okay. Now I will grant you happiness."

I can't stand the pain anymore. I feel like it's never going to go away.

Next Time Will Be Different...

Love…like a road that never ends
How it leads me back again….to heartache
Ill never understand.
I put my heart up on a shelf
till the moment was right, and I told myself…

Next time I fall in love,
Ill know better what to do.
The next time I fall in love...
It will be with you.
…you
…..whoever you are.

Even Though YOU Don't Think So.....Others DO!

Recently I had a conversation with a friend who doesn’t even know me personally. What she said put tears in my eyes. Please, readers, don’t think I’m trying to brag here. That isn’t it at ALL. I’m so far from perfect. But what she said really validated my feelings and I want to remember this conversation whenever I feel hatred around me for no reason at all. I have to remember that someone said this about me…someone who never even met me before.


”Think of the love you give the children you work with, don't let the anger push that away - it is too precious. I know a different part of you that others don't know. I know how even though it is hard and you are struggling, you aren't giving up. I know the love and devotion you feel for those you work with. I know how strong you are becoming (you can't see it yet ;) ) and I know that you are more sensitive to others…
I know now how much you are working on yourself…
I know how much you care…
I know how much you don't want the arguments and want a peaceful existence.”

Not Worth My Tears!

Living here without you is not an easy way of life (only because of the torment you are causing me now)

I spend my time without you; I try to make it all worthwhile (it is)

Standing in a rainfall coming down from the sky

Why should I cry over you?

I keep on thinking about you (and all the pain)

I've got no private pride to hide

I've built my world around you (but I’ve rebuilt a new and better one)

Like a call without reply

My love has lost direction; she's got the sun in her eyes (but one day I will..I will trust again)

Why should I cry over you?

I’m living without you.

- Roxette

Mr Ex, I’m living without you, and I hate to burst your bubble, but it’s GREAT! :D

The Eyes

I can't explain it, but it's a look. A look of pity. As if to say, "aww, I'm so sorry for you..." or "nebach...how sad."

Why would that make someone feel good??

Question: Has anyone else experienced this? How do you handle it? It's such a horrible feeling, and I dread it. I'm almost afraid to meet certain people in the street because I hate the way they make me feel about myself. Being confident and knowing I did nothing wrong should be enough. Having so many people who love me should suffice.

...How come it doesn't?

***THANKS to a special someone (you know who you are) who gave me a pep talk before my cousin's wedding tonight. You saved the day :)